11 In Scripture Study

Song of Solomon (Chapter 1) – Dark, But Lovely (Guest Post)

” I am dark, but lovely,
O daughters of Jerusalem,
Like the tents of Kedar,
Like the curtains of Solomon.
Do not look upon me, because I am dark,
Because the sun has tanned me.
My mother’s sons were angry with me;
They made me the keeper of the vineyards,
But my own vineyard I have not kept.”
(Song of Solomon 1:5-6)

When I first read this verse, I immediately knew what was being said by the Shulamite woman- “I am dark, yet lovely”. There are so many times when I would come to prayer, feeling like no one sees me the way He sees me. In the eyes of the world, I am small and insignificant.  I don’t have a big well-known name or ministry.  I have many physical flaws, one being a missing finger on my right hand, and I’m really not “great” at any one thing.  I struggle just to make “C’s” while others seem to easily get “A’s” as they slide through life.

But when I am in the presence of the Lord, suddenly my opinion of me, which is what all of those things really are, are not a factor any longer. I see myself as dark, but He sees me as lovely. That is why my appearance is of no concern in His presence.

Several years back, I went through a really tough few years. I began in ministry at the ripe age of twenty-two, had my first baby at twenty five, and broke down about twenty-eight. I was very ministry driven, doing for others and for God.  This pleased my heart. It made me feel important, and needed, lovelier I suppose.

Two years after my mental breakdown, I was completely inoperable in ministry, and found myself sitting in a prayer room in Roseville, CA. I began seeing my paradigm shifting, where intimacy with God became my source of breath and life.  After a year or two of primarily ministering to the Lord, I began to minister in areas of administration, etc.

“They made me the keeper of the vineyards,
But my own vineyard I have not kept.”
(Song of Solomon 1:6)

In the past, I had gotten really good about “keeping everyone else’s vineyards”, but when the storms came my way, testing proved my own was not secure.  I had to reestablish the priority of keeping my secret life in God strong before trying to minister outwardly.  This has reinforced the view of how He sees me — beautiful, and lovely.  He wants to spend time with me and be with me.  I am enjoyable to Him, and there’s no greater place I’d rather be.

How about you? Do you primarily keep others vineyards before your own? I know most moms would agree, it is hard to focus on your personal growth and development.  Have you experienced a journey like this? I’d love  for you to share.

Many Blessings,
Gina

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Gina is a wife, mother, teacher, pastor, musician, songwriter, artist, and most importantly, a child of God. She blogs at Sliverlakesound where she shares revelation and insight from the Word of God.  She also has a brand new family blog, family.in.real.time., where she will share more about her family, homeschooling, recipes, DIYs and much more.  Visit Gina at her blogs and say hello!

 

 

PhotobucketGrab the button and link up here, any time between Wednesday and Saturday.  I can’t wait to hear your thoughts on this portion of scripture and how God is speaking to you.

 

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11 Comments

  • Reply
    Beth Ferrell
    June 15, 2011 at 11:31 am

     Oh Barbie, I can’t stand the thought of you ever having a breakdown.  I can relate with being ministry driven.  Once upon a time I was at church 16 hours a week.  IT WAS PATHETIC.  I was a lay pastor, on the church counsel, in the choir, the praise team, the prayer coordinator … and probably more, but that is all I can think of at the moment.  S i c k!   NOW I am reluctant to take on ANY role.  It is definitely a paradigm shift.   Dark yet lovely — lovely to our Lord.  o/  I love Him!

  • Reply
    Beth Ferrell
    June 15, 2011 at 1:54 pm

    Oops, just realized this was written by Gina!  Gina, I hate that YOU went through that.  

    • Reply
      Gina Hyatt
      June 16, 2011 at 7:58 pm

      Thank you Beth for your comments, it is so important to walk with this understanding- it saved me then, and it saves me still. – blessings- gina

  • Reply
    Greg Simas
    June 16, 2011 at 1:22 am

    Great post, Gina. Peoples opinions of us are just that, opinions. I love how God sees us as beautiful. When we step into His presence we look radiant to Him. Knowing I are fully accepted by God gives me unshakeable confidence in life! 

    • Reply
      Gina Hyatt
      June 16, 2011 at 7:59 pm

      yes, so important to keep God’s view of me the only view I’m concerned with. I need that everyday, the confidence in knowing Him!

  • Reply
    Crowleyparty
    June 16, 2011 at 1:42 am

    beautiful post and blog 🙂
    http://www.crowleyparty.blogspot.com

    • Reply
      Barbie
      June 16, 2011 at 3:18 am

      Thank you so much for visiting my blog!

  • Reply
    Marcia
    June 16, 2011 at 9:40 pm

    I may not always link up, Barbie, but just want you to know I’m still following along.

    So appreciate Gina’s post.  These two words stuck out:   “inoperable in ministry.”  Through the years I’ve learned there is no such thing.  The Lord is always ministering through His children even when they may be in the most difficult pits.  I learned this when my dad battled Alzheimer’s many years ago and could not speak a word, recognize us, or even eat during each different stage of that horrific disease.  He began in his mid 50’s and went home with the Lord, His Savior and loving Father, in 2004.  To this day, not even the clearest minds have been able to minister to me as loud and clear as the Lord ministered through him during that battle. 

    Thank you again for sharing–to you, Barbie, and to Gina.

    • Reply
      Barbie
      June 17, 2011 at 5:46 am

       Marcia, I am so thankful for a God who uses broken vessels.  I know that some of my greatest times of ministry come from my broken places.  That’s when it is not about me, and all about Him!  Blessings!

  • Reply
    charis
    June 23, 2011 at 4:56 pm

     this is such a huge revelation and it comes to me in waves.  i love that even when i may be surprised by my darkness He isn’t surprised and He loves me in my worst moments!  He is amazing.  great post gina.

    my recent post: how to find true joy

  • Reply
    charis
    June 23, 2011 at 4:57 pm

     this is such a huge revelation and it comes to me in waves.  i love
    that even when i may be surprised by my darkness He isn’t surprised and
    He loves me in my worst moments!  He is amazing.  great post gina.

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