My Soul Yearns
I am joining Bonnie at Faith Barista today as we discuss our “whitespace” — our personal space where where we meet with God. I have a few different places where I like to meet with the Lord on a daily basis, but none so ministers to my heart as does the Prayer Room at Convergence House of Prayer. I am privileged to belong to this community of believers who are passionately pursuing the Lord through night and day worship and prayer.
Over the last week, a lot of songs have come forth from the Prayer Room that talk about “desire”, “yearning”, “hunger” and “thirst”. I’ve been asking God in my personal whitespace the following questions:
- Does my heart truly yearn for You, and You alone?
- Are Your desires my desires, or am I seeking after selfish ambition?
- What does it mean to hunger and thirst for You?
As the deer pants for the water brooks,
So pants my soul for You, O God.
2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When shall I come and appear before God? (Psalm 42:1-2)
I am learning to be still in my whitespace and listen to the yearning in my heart. I will admit that I have a hard time “being” in His presence. I am a “doer” by nature. I still feel like I have to come with Bible and journal in tow, always ready to write — always ready to do something for Him. But I must learn the art of being still. It is vital to my spiritual growth.
During one of my “still” moments this week, the Lord began to speak to me about longing.
Longing: a profound unfulfilled desire or need.
I was made for God. My heart yearns and cries out for the Living God, even before my mind, will and emotions realize their need of Him. I have tasted and seen His goodness and it has left me longing for more. I have a beautiful family, amazing friends, a fabulous house of prayer community, etc. But still, my heart aches. It’s a longing so deep that it’s hard to describe with words. But when it comes, this longing, everything within me cries out for the Living God.
I was created for Him. To be with Him. Inside the heart of every human being is the innate desire to know their Creator. Our hearts were made to long for God. This longing will never be satisfied by earthly things. No relationship, no matter how Godly. No amount of wealth or worldly possessions. Nothing will ever satisfy the longing that was meant to be filled by God.
When I am not meeting with God in my personal whitespace, I am left empty and unfulfilled. I am left longing, yearning, aching.
O God, You are my God;
Early will I seek You;
My soul thirsts for You;
My flesh longs for You
In a dry and thirsty land
Where there is no water. (Psalm 63:1)
I know His voice. It’s a familiar, loving and gentle voice. He is wooing me to come to Him so that He can fulfill this longing deep inside my heart.
“When I heard Your voice,
when You said my name,
when I heard Your voice
my heart it yearned.”
I hear the voice of my Beloved saying, “Rise up, my darling! Come away with me, my fair one!” (Song of Solomon 2:13)
And my heart responds, “I am coming Lord!”