What Do I Have To Give?
I‘ve been struggling for words lately. My brain seems full of them, yet as soon as I begin to write I lose those words. Fleeting thoughts as some would call them. I can’t seem to grab onto them, to articulate them so as to write clearly. I feel as if I am striving too much, trying hard to make it happen, rather than relying on Holy Spirit to inspire me. And I’ve been so tired, often feeling like I am chasing my life, like a cat chases his tail. Round and round in circles I go, yet never really accomplishing much. By the time the day is done, I don’t feel like I have anything left to give. There are so many things that I contend with in my day. Sometimes my perspective gets skewed and this can affect my thoughts and leave me reaching for inspiration. And although life happens, the Lord has a solution to every road block that I could possibly face in my day.
When I get up late in the morning and bark orders at my children to move them out the door quickly,
I can stop and ask Holy Spirit to come and bring peace.
When I arrive at work and I don’t feel as if I am accomplishing anything due to my scattered thoughts,
I can stop and ask Him for wisdom and revelation as to how best to structure my day.
When I get off work and am rushed to make dinner, help with homework, baths and showers, pick up toys, do laundry and squeeze in quality time with my family,
I can stop and ask for Him to come and fill me to overflowing with His joy.
When the house is finally quiet at night, and I come here to write, but the words don’t come,
I can stop and pray and say, “Come Holy Spirit, give me Your words”.
Some days I just don’t feel like I have much to give. And then I realize I’ve forgotten to pull into the “self service” station and fill up on strength, peace, joy and love. I never want to walk through life trying to accomplish anything in my own strength. I don’t want to feel like I am striving to be a good wife or mother, or a good writer for that matter. Some days, the words just aren’t going to come and that’s okay.
So when I asked Him, “Lord, what do I have to give”, do you know what I heard Him say?
“You don’t have to give me anything. All I want is You. I want to be with you. I want to spend time with you. I want to lavish my love on you. I want to show you how to be a good wife and mother. And I want to give you the inspired words to share with others. But you have to come. You have to stop. You have to lay aside those things that “keep you busy” and from my presence just long enough to tap into all that I have for you. When your heart is filled with anxious thoughts, how could you possibly give back love, joy and peace to others? Come to me. Allow me to wash over you with the water of my word. I long to bring you joy. Cease from your striving and rest in me. Don’t worry about doing. Just simply be.”
What a beautiful reminder that everything I do must flow from a place of intimacy with Him. I cannot accomplish anything good without Him. So I am going to take some time to “be” and not worry so much about the writing. If the words come, I will write. If they don’t, I will wait on Him. Someone asked me just the other night how I blog so regularly. I really don’t know how I do it. But I do know that I don’t want to write for the sake of writing. I want my words to be full of life, hope and encouragement to those who stop by.
Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. (Matthew 11:28)
How about you? Are you feeling tired and worn out? Will you take some time today to allow yourself to be filled up with His peace, joy, love and strength? Life is so much more fun when we live it out of the overflow.
Have a beautiful week my friends!