Today I am joining in the 5 Minute Friday where we are given a word prompt and write for just 5 minutes simply for the joy of writing. No editing or backtracking necessary. No need to be perfect. Just words freely flowing from my heart to yours.
Most days, I do not feel like I am enough. I can never seem to keep my home clean. The laundry is piling up, and clean clothes are now overflowing out of laundry baskets. I noticed that the base boards in my bathroom were black from all of the dirt and grim that hasn’t been clean in what seems like forever. There are science projects growing in the back of my refrigerator, and my vacuum has not seen the light of day in over a month.
And I yell at my children. And I know that I do. I get frustrated and angry and instead of getting on my knees before the Father and asking for wisdom I react. And I do not give my husband the time and attention he deserves. Lately it’s been hard. I’ve been weighted down and over-emotional and He is working hard and striving to make enough money to provide for our family.
I have good intentions to meal plan and grocery shop every week. The school year is beginning and I have yet to purchase my daughter’s curriculum. I fear the word organization as I can’t ever seem to keep anything organized for more than an hour.
I don’t feel as if I am enough most days. I am tired, stressed, upset and emotional. And I’ve had enough of that behavior.
On days like today, when all I can see is my lack, I must pull on the One who is enough, full of grace and forgiveness. In my weakness, He is strong.
Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. (2 Corinthians 12:9)
* * *
I am sorry if this post is a little bit of a downer. I’m just being real. I do know where my strength comes from. Always looking up!