22 In Faith

God Will Grow Your Heart

I haven’t had many words to share with you lately.  With the juggling of work, ministry, family and homeschooling, I have had to allow myself time to step back and wait for God to speak.  I never want to force my writing here.  I love when God speaks clearly to me and gives me the words that I hope will encourage you.

Today I was sitting in the prayer room during our staff set.  Normally, I would open my computer and log into YouVersion to catch up on my Bible reading plans. Or, I would continue reading the current book that I am working through.  But today I decided to just sit and look at Jesus.

My heart has been heavy with the weight of all that has happened in the last few days in the world.  Storms, tornados, lives lost.  It’s hard sometimes to take it all in.  I purposefully choose not to watch the news, or read too much, because my heart is so vulnerable.  I am afraid that if I spend too much time looking at the circumstances surrounding me, that I will lose sight of Jesus in the midst of it.

As I sat in the prayer room today to look at Him, a song came forth from the worship on the stream about giving our hearts to God, loving Him completely and walking in love.  As I sang the words, and waited for my heart to feel what I so desperately longed to feel, I saw myself, with arms outstretched before the Throne of God.  In my hands I carried my heart.  It was small in comparison to the size of my hands.  I almost felt ashamed that I was bringing such a small heart before a big God.  As I continued to sing and pray, I say a stream of colors come down like a waterfall and pour over my heart.  I immediately connected this stream of color with the love of God.  It was as if liquid love was being poured into my heart and I saw my heart grow in size.

and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.  (Ephesians 3:19)

In order for my heart to grow in love, I must know the giver of love.  As I sat and reflected on the encounter that I had just had with God, I realized how much I need to be filled with God, to be filled with His love, so that I can pour out onto a world around me who needs a touch from Him.  It really is all about the love of God.  The more time I sit and gaze at Him, the more I am filled with His love.  I cannot make my heart grow.  Only God, through His love, can grow my heart.

Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.

Are you taking time to sit and look at Jesus?  What is it that you see?  How is God growing your heart with His love?  I would love it if you would share with me in the comments below.

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22 Comments

  • Reply
    Rosann
    May 23, 2013 at 4:43 am

    Oh, Barbie, I can completely relate with this. I’ve struggled to find words to write the past few days as well. We are going through such a difficult struggle with my MIL’s health. Yesterday I wrote a blog post about how her declining health has had such an effect on my heart, but it’s one I’ll probably never publish because so many local friends know her and also read my blog. I would hate to invade her privacy or seem disrespectful. But I’ve had those moments of staring at Jesus and seeing Him reach His hand out, touching my face. It’s an awesome feeling–being that in tune with the Holy Spirit. It’s a gift! I loved reading how God gifted you with a very visual sign of His love for you. Thank you for sharing your experience. It is encouraging to read about when we’re in the midst of such turmoil in the world. <3
    Rosann recently posted..Staycations Offer Family Fun!

    • Reply
      Barbie
      May 23, 2013 at 4:39 pm

      I will definately be praying for you, my friend, as well as your mother-in-law. Hugs!

  • Reply
    Mary
    May 23, 2013 at 4:58 am

    This is lovely Barb and so true. When I take the time to be quiet, to listen and not try to rush things…often those are the times he speaks the loudest. Lovely words from a lovely online friend.

    Hugs~
    Mary
    Mary recently posted..When you can’t see the end…

    • Reply
      Barbie
      May 23, 2013 at 4:40 pm

      Thanks so much Mary. Love seeing your beautiful face here!

  • Reply
    Stephanie Hanes
    May 23, 2013 at 4:59 am

    First of all, I love that you wait for Him to give you the words, because, ultimately, we write for an audience of One and what good are our words if not inspired by and for Him? It’s why I haven’t been writing as often lately either – because sometimes I just need to sit and BE with Him in the silence. Second, I am exactly the same way when it comes to news of tragedies like the tornado – I have to limit my time spent looking at images and reading articles (and this is why I’m glad we have no tv…) because my heart is so very vulnerable too. I feel emotions so deeply and take things to heart so much that I have to protect my heart by limiting how much news I am even aware of sometimes. I like what you said though – that if you spend too much time looking at the tragedies like this you might lose sight of Him…and that’s NEVER a good place to be. These are beautiful words today, friend.

    Also, I so appreciate your faithfulness in reading and commenting on my new blog series. And I appreciate your friendship. 🙂
    Stephanie Hanes recently posted..{Bigger Picture Poetry) When Storms Come

    • Reply
      Barbie
      May 23, 2013 at 4:41 pm

      It’s a struggle at times. I think I need to have words, post so many times, etc. But I am learning that it’s most important that the words come from Him, straight to the hearts of others. I love reading your blog and you too are such an encouragement. Blessings!

  • Reply
    Maria @ The Ruth Project
    May 23, 2013 at 5:20 am

    I am so touched by the images you described here. It is always amazing what we feel and see when we just sit and be still with God. It is powerful. As I grow as a Christian one of the things I have noticed is that I am more empathetic, something I never was, and really feel what others are feeling so when you have events like the OK tornado, believe me I feel them. But I have to see the news; to me it gives me the opportunity to prepare my heart and soul for endurance and for the fact that while awfulness is happening in the world, it is possible to find God in the midst of it. I cried my eyes out but it also quickened my heart for prayers amongst the tears. It is how he has grown my heart and I am forever grateful to him.
    Maria @ The Ruth Project recently posted..Building a Community: The Ruth Project

    • Reply
      Barbie
      May 23, 2013 at 4:43 pm

      Thank you for stopping by Maria! Yes, I watch the news, but after the first few stories, I can tend to get depressed, if I’m not looking at Jesus or giving the burden back to Him. Such a tragedy, but God is in the midst and I know that there is hope. Have a beautiful weekend.

  • Reply
    Jennifer peterson
    May 23, 2013 at 6:14 am

    I feel the same way I don’t want to force any words, but I have to say I am always blessed by your words. God he is growing my heart in so many areas, how do I pick, marriage, friends, but I think mostly He is growing me in trusting Him, even when I don’t have the answers to why. Love you

    • Reply
      Barbie
      May 23, 2013 at 4:44 pm

      Life is a journey of learning to trust Him, isn’t it? So thankful that He is growing your heart in this way. Love you my friend!

  • Reply
    Sarah
    May 23, 2013 at 7:38 am

    Hi Barbie! I love your words this morning. It is always so encouraging for me to read words about true faith and what God is speaking (as opposed to ‘fluff’ posts). I’m learning to wait for Him to speak also. It’s funny because I can sometimes want to write something just to have a new post up on my blog. But usually when that happens, the words get jumbled and I get discouraged. When I take my time and wait for the Lord to speak, the words usually flow with ease. And those really are the best moments. Waiting on Him and having Him fill us up.

    PS – You have a beautiful site here. 🙂
    Sarah recently posted..What Are You Afraid Of?

    • Reply
      Barbie
      May 23, 2013 at 4:59 pm

      Thank you, Sarah, for stopping by my space. It’s hard to resist the writing when we feel the pressure to perform. But I am learning to sit and wait, and sometimes it feels like forever before I can write. You too have a beautiful blog. We both live in California! I am following you along now.

  • Reply
    Dianne
    May 23, 2013 at 8:21 am

    beautiful post–I love that God speaks to you in pictures and colorful ones at that–thank you!
    Dianne recently posted..The God of Second Chances

    • Reply
      Barbie
      May 23, 2013 at 5:06 pm

      Thanks Diane for stopping by. I loved your post today about second changes. Blessings!

  • Reply
    Elizabeth
    May 23, 2013 at 8:43 am

    I’ve been quiet this week as well. Haven’t blog for three days. I think we’ve all felt it, the need to draw nearer to Him, the need to let His love flow to us, in us, through us. Love you, friend.
    Elizabeth recently posted..A quiet week…

    • Reply
      Barbie
      May 23, 2013 at 5:06 pm

      Love you too! Leaning close to Him. Have a beautiful weekend.

  • Reply
    Debbie
    May 23, 2013 at 9:58 am

    Jesus, seems silent to me at this time. I miss special moments like that with him. Hope this silence ends soon.
    Debbie recently posted..Embracing Obscurity: A Book Review

    • Reply
      Barbie
      May 23, 2013 at 5:07 pm

      It’s hard when we feel we cannot hear HIm. I know that He’s always speaking though. Let’s lean in closer. Ask Him for His heart. He will show you. Blessings!

  • Reply
    Michele-Lyn
    May 23, 2013 at 5:39 pm

    What a beautiful encounter you had with the Lord. It makes me hunger and thirst after Him, time with Him, just to see Him or see how He sees me. I love that you did this, “…today I decided to just sit and look at Jesus.”

    The amazing thing about time with God like that is we don’t know how He’s changed us, and transformed us until we walk out some of our days. Then we see, somehow we are different, we see different, we live different, and in good ways — from glory to glory. Beautiful, friend.
    Michele-Lyn recently posted..Dear weary mama, you are a hero.

  • Reply
    Beth
    May 23, 2013 at 7:05 pm

    Barbie, Thank you for how you share your heart. Your words always touch my own heart. You can always feel how God is speaking through you. You do encourage! I’ve been reading the book by Paul E. Miller, Love Walked Among Us, and what you’ve shared beautifully speaks to the love of Christ…to how He loved us and how we need to be filled with His love and allow it to “pour out onto a world around us who needs a touch from Him.” So beautiful. Blessings to you. Beth
    Beth recently posted..His Amazing Grace {Graffiti Summer}

  • Reply
    Melanie Wilson @theinspiredday
    May 23, 2013 at 7:12 pm

    Barbie, I’ve been feeling so disconnected from God since going on vacation. I didn’t have the alone time I normally have. It’s been so good to be home again so I can spend solitary time in the Word and in prayer. I will say that I’m glad to know once again what a difference it makes.

    God bless you in this time and thanks for sharing a good word with us all!
    Melanie Wilson @theinspiredday recently posted..Don’t Let Sad Hold You Back

  • Reply
    Donna
    May 27, 2013 at 4:34 am

    When we open our hearts to HIm, He is faithful to take our heart of stone and give us a heart of flesh. Thanks for sharing this so beautifully.
    Donna recently posted..Sheep of His Hand

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