A Failed Pot Roast And How It Threatened To Define Me


It all started with a pot roast.  I thought I would be all domestic and prepare dinner in the crock pot. Normally I would start it around 1:30PM and cook it for about 4 hours on low.  But it didn’t get started until after 3PM.  Nervous that it wouldn’t be done in time, I put the crock pot on high, figuring dinner would be served around 6:30PM.

6:30 came and went, and still dinner wasn’t ready.  As the children began to complain of hunger, my husband did his best to help the pot roast along by removing it from the crock pot and putting it in the oven. It took a while, but we eventually sat down to dinner around 7:30PM.

And then they came. First as thoughts in my mind, and then as words out of my mouth before I could stop myself,

Why do I have to ruin everything?
Why can’t I do anything right?
I’m not a good wife.
I’ll never attempt to make dinner again.
I’m such a failure.

I realized something this evening.  I’m still not free.  I am still held in bondage to the constant barrage of self-destructive thoughts and words that seek to define who I am.

But it didn’t start with the pot roast.  It actually started a long time ago.

Lies.  Labels I’ve put on myself due to feelings of unworthiness and low self esteem.  I wrote about them in my book, Coffee Talk With Jesus.  You would think I’d be a little farther along in this journey.

For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.  (Galatians 5:1)

Christ came to set me free.  I can walk in freedom because He made a way for me out of the pit of destruction and despair.  The question that plagued me this night was: Will I choose freedom?

I am realizing more and more that the thoughts I entertain about myself and the words that come out of my mouth are more habit than reality.  I must make a choice, every minute of every day, to choose to breathe life into my Spirit.

I can walk in freedom because Christ has set me free.

I refuse to be defined by my mistakes, shortcomings and failed pot roasts.

I am pressing in.  I know what He says about me.

I am beautiful.
I am adored.
I am good.
I am loved.

I choose to believe.

What untruth is threatening to define you my friend?  What scripture are you using to counter that untruth with truth?

photo credit: AlicePopkorn via photopin cc

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22 thoughts on “A Failed Pot Roast And How It Threatened To Define Me”

  1. Helen Tisdale says:

    OH BARBIE! This was just a beautiful post. As always, you are so transparent! That is what helps so many of us who are struggling also; you know mine, this terrible fear of writing. Yes, STILL! But because of your humble words, I am going to sit down this morning with the Lord and leave them and take His precious promises in return. Thankyou Barbie!
    Helen Tisdale recently posted..Coffee Talk With Jesus: Book Review

    1. Barbie says:

      There’s no fear in love my friend. And He loves you! So write, write your heart and share your words with those who need to read them. Hugs!

  2. Mary says:

    What a great post, Barbie! We have to stop the negative thoughts and self-talk and to do that we have to RECOGNIZE that we are saying them and having them. I love the way you turn this around and remembered you are beautiful, adored, good and loved…because you are, I am, we all are.

    What an encouraging post! ,
    Mary recently posted..When the beauty of the unglued brings you to your knees…

    1. Barbie says:

      Thank you Mary. I turned it around to write the words I know are true, yet my heart longs to catch up. So thankful He is patient with me. Thanks for blessing me with your comments!

  3. Missy says:

    I experience these thoughts that have become more habit than anything else, too, Barbie. I LOVED this post. It was a much needed encouragement to my heart this morning as I rail against my inabilities as wife and mother. I am loved. I am free. Do not look back on the things of old. Yes! (P.S. I am LOVING your book!)
    Missy recently posted..I Thought You Would Like To Know

    1. Barbie says:

      You grab a hold of those thoughts and don’t let go! So thankful my book is blessing you 🙂

    1. Barbie says:

      Have a beautiful day Jennifer. I always love when you visit here.

  4. Joan says:

    Well, first of all, what a great title! LOL It grabbed me and brought me right over to this great post! Sorry you had a bit of trouble with the meal last night. Believe me, I have done things like that over and over!! You have brought up a great point here. We need to make the choice to remember and believe what God says about us and not the lies of the enemy!! I have discovered over the years that when I make some great steps forward, our enemy doesn’t like it and seeks to make me back step by whispering his lies in my ear. So, it is wise to be doubly vigilant, stand on the Word and remember the the words of Truth!

    Blessings, Joan
    Joan recently posted..Sharing His Beauty Blog Link-Up

    1. Barbie says:

      AMEN Joan!

  5. Shelly Hendricks (@Renewed_Daily) says:

    So many lies play over and over again in my head, most having to do with my unworthiness, how diminished I am with this illness, and that I am alone. My favorite scripture is the passage about the Faith of Abraham. And here is my favorite part: “and being fully assured that what God had promised, He was able also to perform.” – Romans 4:21

    That’ll preach.

    Heart Hugs, Shelly <3
    Shelly Hendricks (@Renewed_Daily) recently posted..We Have a Deliverer

    1. Barbie says:

      Oh Shelly, you are not unworthy and you are not alone. The enemy comes to kill, steal and destroy, but God comes to give LIVE and that more abundantly. Hang on to His words my friend. Hang on!

  6. child of God says:

    Recognizing is a big step towards healing. A cross country race is not run in one day, it takes pacing and resting and refueling in order to finish the race set before us. I bet that roast was delish! I’ll let you in on something…I did a similar thing with a turkey but I had a whole company of guests for dinner, something like 20 and the turkey wasn’t done when it was supposed to be done. We didn’t eat until 8 pm. I felt so sick inside and like such a failure but the guests were gracious and loved on me anyway.

    You are NOT a failure but a racer who knows what she needs to work on. 🙂
    I love you girl.
    child of God recently posted..Obedience

    1. Barbie says:

      Thank you, my friend. I am so grateful for your encouragement!

  7. Susan Stilwell says:

    What a great post, Barbie. You hit the nail on the head when you said we have to CHOOSE. I choose to believe what God says about me and that Galatians verse is a standard! Another great “truth” is in the song, “I Am New” by Jason Gray. I hum that chorus ALL. THE. TIME.
    Hugs to you today. See you tomorrow at Beth’s!
    Susan Stilwell recently posted..The ER isn’t usually a funny place, but funny conversations happen there

    1. Barbie says:

      Blessings Susan! Have a beautiful weekend.

  8. Wanda says:

    Oh Barbie, these same lies invade my thoughts far more often than I care to say. The struggle to combat is constant one I wage. Thanks for shining the light on these dark thoughts.
    Wanda recently posted..The Flattery of Spam and Ways to Combat It

    1. Barbie says:

      We will rise victorious, my friend! AMEN?

  9. Elizabeth@BeautyObserved says:

    I could identify with this post so much! Thank you for being so transparent and for pointed us to Christ! Also, I bet you didn’t know that my word for this year is “freedom!”
    Elizabeth@BeautyObserved recently posted..A Walk To The Park

    1. Barbie says:

      Oh, that’s a good word! Walking in freedom is something that is an ongoing journey, at least for me!

  10. Lisa says:

    So real and true, Barbie! I think the enemy will never give up trying to make us revisit our past weaknesses…but the beauty of growth is that we finally learn to recognize the lies for what they are and respond with the Truth! ♥
    Lisa recently posted..Yes, It IS a Post About Pickles!

    1. Barbie says:

      Responding with the truth of God’s Word is so important. Thank you for stopping by Lisa!

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