69 In Weekend Whispers

The Weekend Brew: When Writing is Hard

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*photo credit

As a writer, you never want to feel as if you’ve hit a wall and your voice is nowhere to be found.  It’s discouraging when you want to say something, but there are no words.  I’m tired of striving. I have always been real and authentic in this space, so I will tell you that I am in a hard place.  There are many facets of my life that I am struggling with.  And I haven’t been taking the time I need to seek His heart in these matters.  It’s been both emotionally and physically draining.  It feels as if I’ve been thrown in a pit without a rope, left to find my own way out.  But I know He’s with me.  He’s never left me, and He will deliver me.

Writing is just hard sometimes.  I was on an uphill climb back in November with the final editing of my book and then the publishing of it in December.  But ever since then, I’ve been a little out of sorts in the writing.  The words aren’t flowing as easily as before.  I seem to be fighting for the time to right, longing for quiet, reaching for revelation.  It’s just not there.  I’ve been considering this link up and that link up, just to keep this blog alive.

But when did writing become about survival?

I don’t want this blog to survive.  I want it to thrive. But I’m tired.  And I’m a little depressed. (What mid-life, post-menopausal, full-time working, stay up too late mom, with four kids, full-time ministry and a blog wouldn’t be?)  I’ve been ignoring the emptiness inside of me.  And, I’ve crashed.  I have not the strength to keep climbing.  I long for flat ground, where I don’t have to work so hard.

I am going to be taking a little break from the blog.  I am hoping it won’t be to long.  But I am in desperate need of Jesus.  I am in desperate need of a touch from Him.  I need to sit before Him, to wait in His presence and hear His heart for my life both personally and as it relates to my writing ministry.  I do not doubt that He’s placed me here.  But I know that without Him, I can do nothing.

Will you keep me in your prayers as I take the hand of Jesus and allow Him to lead me on this journey?

I have a wonderful guest post from my Inspired Blogger, Holly Barrett on Monday, so make sure you come back to read.

I hope to be back next weekend for The Weekend Brew.  If I am not, no worries, I will have someone host it for me.

Thank you for reading my words, which are ultimately His words.  I so appreciate you!

*I know this is a little different post than I normally write for the Weekend Brew. It is not meant to be a downer.  I want to give you permission to lay down whatever it is you are striving for, and take the time you need to rest and refuel.  We can do nothing without Him.

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3. Visit the person who linked up before you (and a few others if you have time).

 

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69 Comments

  • Reply
    Cathy
    January 24, 2014 at 11:01 pm

    Praying you will be refreshed during your break from blogging Barbie. God bless. : )
    Cathy recently posted..He Desires Your Love…

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 7:52 pm

      Thank you Cathy! I loved your post today.

  • Reply
    Elizabeth
    January 24, 2014 at 11:05 pm

    First of all, friend, you sat down and wrote a book!!! Do you know how many of us say we want to but have never started? Secondly, your church just moved into a new building… As an intercession that had to require some major prayer warfare and as a staff person, lots of hard work, thirdly you’re a wife and mom, fourth, you’ve been in a long season of difficulties. Give yourself permission to rest, to allow yourself to be weak and lean on God’s strength. Do what you need to do for you for a change. We’ll still be here when you come back.
    Elizabeth recently posted..Deuteronomy 28:47-48…

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 7:56 pm

      Thank you friend. I have a hard time shutting everything off and taking care of me. Love you!

  • Reply
    Helen Tisdale
    January 24, 2014 at 11:15 pm

    Oh Barbie! My heart just goes out to you! You are deserving of a season of rest. You have gone into overload and you just need to allow God to rock you in His arms! We love you, admire you and lift you up in prayer.
    Helen Tisdale recently posted..Coffee Talk With Jesus: Book Review

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 7:56 pm

      Thank you Helen. I so appreciate you!

  • Reply
    Jennifer Camp
    January 24, 2014 at 11:29 pm

    Barbie, I understand. This rest is going to be so good! He is your strong place, sister. You don’t have to be the strong one. Much love and prayers. You are a tremendous blessing. xo
    Jennifer Camp recently posted..cool stuff gathered up, for His girls

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 7:57 pm

      Thank you Jennifer. You are such a blessing to me.

  • Reply
    Jedidja
    January 24, 2014 at 11:47 pm

    Barbie do not despair. After great effort and work under pressure of time, many people, especially writers, have a dip. Me too. My book came out in February and after that I had the same symptoms as you. And think of Elijah, after what he did on Mount Carmel he was so tired. Go with your weary heart and life to Jesus. Rest in His presence. Your blog will not be lost In the meantime.
    Jedidja recently posted..Vandaag zorgt God

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 7:58 pm

      Thank you Jedidja! I appreciate your prayers.

  • Reply
    Janis@Heart-Filled Moments
    January 25, 2014 at 2:54 am

    Barbie, you have done a lot! Take it easy for awhile. Just writing a book would drain anyone. You have to step away for awhile and rest.
    I know I’ve hit many a day when the words just don’t flow and I want to give up. But this is not one of those times for you.
    Let God restore you in shady green pastures where you can breathe, have some family time, and do what gives you joy and peace.
    Love you Barbie! You are a sweetheart. And we will be praying for you.
    Blessings,
    Janis
    Janis@Heart-Filled Moments recently posted..A New Home

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 7:58 pm

      Oh Janis, you bless me. I am seeking the green pastures and the river of life. Blessings!

  • Reply
    Donna Schultz
    January 25, 2014 at 3:52 am

    Rest well in Him, friend! You deserve it!
    Donna Schultz recently posted..A Modern Day Moses

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:00 pm

      Thank you Donna! Have a beautiful weekend.

  • Reply
    Shelly Hendricks (@Renewed_Daily)
    January 25, 2014 at 4:18 am

    Sweet friend, we come here to have coffee with you, and we’d come here even if this space was devoid of words. Allow yourself the grace you so freely give to others. Enjoy your rest. Love you! Heart Hugs, Shelly <3
    Shelly Hendricks (@Renewed_Daily) recently posted..Recommendation Saturday: Nothing

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:01 pm

      I am so thankful that you come, Shelly. I so appreciate you!

  • Reply
    Mary
    January 25, 2014 at 4:25 am

    I have been there…maybe I am there. I promise to pray for you, Barbie. I know what it is like to want to write, yet, the words do not come. There are so far off in the distance that sometimes I think writing is a mirage. Prayers and hugs coming your way my sweet friend.
    Mary recently posted..5 minute Friday…VISIT

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:01 pm

      Mary, I’ve actually been thinking of you. I pray you are well.

  • Reply
    Joanne Viola
    January 25, 2014 at 5:00 am

    Barbie, may you find yourself restored & renewed from taking a break. I have been blessed by your words time and time again. “My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him.” (Ps.62:1). May you find the rest you need during this break. Blessings!
    Joanne Viola recently posted..Of Approval, Survival & Hope

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:02 pm

      What a perfect scripture Joanne. Thank you for sharing it! Blessings!

  • Reply
    Deb Weaver
    January 25, 2014 at 6:27 am

    Oh, sweetie, REST, refresh, rejuvenate! I’ve been in a similar place recently. So much emotion, so much discouragement, so much hopelessness–I’ve been fighting with Scripture and gratitude, but it’s exhausting! May God hold us tenderly and give us rest for our souls. May He whisper in ways we may hear. May His Word meet us right where we are. May He heal and plant His purposes and plans within us. (((HUGS)))

    Deb Weaver
    Deb Weaver recently posted..“My One Word: Purpose”

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:03 pm

      Deb, you are such a blessing! Thank you for coming here to encourage my heart.

  • Reply
    Joan
    January 25, 2014 at 7:51 am

    Hi Barbie! I understand…really, I do. Sometimes God gives us a voice through writing and sometimes He wants us to sit with Him and be fed. It is the ebb and flow of writing for God… We need to receive from Him in order to share. It is absolutely necessary and totally normal! 🙂 I love your blog and the way you share God’s love through it and I am looking forward to when you are back to share some more! Blessings and love, Joan
    Joan recently posted..Steady Footsteps

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:04 pm

      You are a such a constant encourager to me Joan. Thank you!

  • Reply
    ~Karrilee~
    January 25, 2014 at 7:56 am

    Oh sweet Barbie – you know I get this… and you know I will be praying, friend! Take your time! What we love about you and your space here is that we get you and Him as a package deal… let Him fill you up and refresh you! Let Him come in for a Visitation, not just a visit… host His Presence a bit and you will find what you need! Love you bunches, girlie!
    ~Karrilee~ recently posted..That Thing I Do Now – Vol 28

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:04 pm

      I loved your post about the Visitation Karrilee! That’s exactly what I’m hoping for!

  • Reply
    Kasey
    January 25, 2014 at 7:57 am

    Sweet Barbie, We all need a rest from time to time–take that time to renew, refresh, and rejuvenate. My heart goes out to you! You will be in my thoughts and prayers. Drink in the Lord. Give yourself the time you need to renew your soul. Don ‘t worry about the blog, it will be here when you return and so will we. Blessings and love, Kasey

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:05 pm

      Thank you Kasey! I appreciate you.

  • Reply
    Jacqui
    January 25, 2014 at 8:41 am

    Praying for you, Barbie! You juggle a whole lot more than me, and I’m always so impressed. Have a wonderful break. Breathe. Enjoy. Be blessed. Much love.
    Jacqui recently posted..Comment on Encouragement to a Mother’s Fear by Leah

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:05 pm

      Thankful for friends like you Jacqui!

  • Reply
    ~ linda
    January 25, 2014 at 8:48 am

    Dear Barbie, I know the feeling in some ways and have been silent in my blogging for periods. I find that once I release the blog and a few other things, and I follow His call to me to be near, He covers me with His dew of refreshing. It takes time with Him and time of quiet. Don’t rush and feel pressure. You have enough already. God will be there with you and I will be praying for you and your family.
    I truly am…
    Caring through Christ, ~ linda
    ~ linda recently posted..He is the Word

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:06 pm

      Thank you for your prayers Linda! They are so appreciated.

  • Reply
    Heather McCool
    January 25, 2014 at 9:34 am

    Oh Barbie, I am in such a similar place. I was just thinking about how sometimes life feels so much like a rollercoaster, strapped to the seat and that big drop is just too much, but you cant get off.
    Im still figuring out what to do about my drop, but im glad you are taking some time off those things you can. 🙂 hoping the time is refreshing!

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:07 pm

      Thank you Heather!

  • Reply
    Sharon
    January 25, 2014 at 10:01 am

    Yes, Barbie. I understand. There have been many times when the writing was hard – times when it felt like I was chipping away at a piece of marble. And times when my personal life was so draining that I scarcely had words in real life. So, please take the time that God is calling you to, take the time to refresh and restore. Let Him guide you as to what to do in the future.

    We’ll miss you here in Blog Land, and we’ll look forward to your (hopefully soon) return. But more than anything, I am excited for you, because I just know that God is going to meet you in this time away.

    GOD BLESS!
    Sharon recently posted..HOMECOMING DAY – A Poem For My Dad

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:07 pm

      AMEN Sharon! I cannot wait for the encounter!

  • Reply
    Dawn St Amand Paoletta
    January 25, 2014 at 11:15 am

    Barbie, OH! Here it is! Can I just interject, my beautiful friend? I believe that you will write again, when you are renewed in Him- if it is His will! BUT, that being said…you know He would not want you to feel burdened by this gift. And what you are going through would be so consistent with what many go through after achieving a great and long sought after goal…you have many gifts to share but the greatest is just in knowing and enjoying him. So, step back and trust Him. Enjoy him. I will be praying. One thing I am learning, still, is to prioritize my time in His word, alone, and that is it. I am behind in reviews, and reading…but I am not behind in sitting in His presence and reading His word. So whether I manage to squeeze in a post or not is based on the fruit of my time with Him (in varied forms, I might add- as I am sure it is for you). How about just drinking Him in…we all love and appreciate you. We will still be around. But being refreshed in Him, is not something that can happen when we are busy with ideas, plans, and our own thinking…well, at least until we drink him and hear him first…I think I kind of went there with my FMF post…but I hope this all does not sound preachy or condescending. You pour out and bless, you have achieved a BIG accomplishment publishing and following through with all you did in that endeavor. The world may say hurry, and do something else, but a rejoicing and resting in His presence, could never be a bad thing…no matter the season. Relax, Refresh , Renew( hey, I used to teach a class called that!) …draw from His well, my friend. It will be well with your soul. MUCH love and hugs…PS- if you need to hold off on the 31st, I would understand. Let me know if what you can or can’t do, in light of all. Recharge those batteries…PRAYING.
    Dawn St Amand Paoletta recently posted..The Visit (5 Minute Friday)

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:09 pm

      Dawn, I absolutely love and appreciate you. And we are on for the 31st. It’s on your blog and I will stop to visit. Thank you so much for your prayers!

  • Reply
    Lisa @ four simply living
    January 25, 2014 at 1:38 pm

    I hope your break fills you up and rejuvenates you. Be blessed friend.
    Lisa @ four simply living recently posted..Comment on Friday Randomness… mistakes a plenty by Barbie

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:09 pm

      Thank you Lisa!

  • Reply
    Anders
    January 25, 2014 at 1:39 pm

    I adore your fancy style,
    worship your amazing smile,
    which by no means you are fit!
    Definitely you’ve got it!

    ·:| † |:· Happy recovery, sister!

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 1:58 pm

      Anders, thank you so much. You made me smile today! Blessings!

      • Reply
        Anders
        January 25, 2014 at 2:44 pm

        *smile* – Life better be a challenge.

  • Reply
    Elizabeth@BeautyObserved
    January 25, 2014 at 2:29 pm

    Barbie,

    I am sorry that you are having a rough time right now. I think January can be an extremely difficult month for many of us. We push, push, push during November and December and then we have a physical and emotional let down in January.

    I will be praying for rest and restoration during this time.

    (((hugs)))
    Elizabeth
    Elizabeth@BeautyObserved recently posted..How Fun! Vol. 9

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:10 pm

      Thank you so much Elizabeth!

  • Reply
    Healed By His Wounds
    January 25, 2014 at 3:10 pm

    God bless you, Barbie… May He write His Peace upon your heart and mind in the coming days.

    ~HBHW
    Healed By His Wounds recently posted..Weaned from Earth

  • Reply
    Patty
    January 25, 2014 at 3:12 pm

    Barbie,
    First of all, I want to say how much I appreciate you sharing this. We all need to be transparent in the highs and lows of our walk so that no one ever gets the false idea that it always looks good and comes easy. I know the feelings you are feeling – I can taste them and wear them right now as you write. I have come to believe that our inner life must be more full than the outer or we are on the road to burn-out. I’ve seen it in my own walk. It creeps up. I’m sailing along: parenting, check, wifehood, check, job, check, blog, check, ministry, check … and then wham! It hits. I feel hollow and like I’ve been ignoring the deeper things. God is so good to allow us to both be busy and to slow. I know this time of slowing may bring up pain, but it will bear much, much fruit in the end. And, you will have my prayers. Thank you for setting the example of what is healthy when we hit this place — to pull back and to retreat and to regroup with God in silence and quiet and intimate places with Him. You have my prayers and support during this season. I only wish I could give you a hug in person.
    Patty recently posted..Silence

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:11 pm

      Patty, you’ve truly encouraged my heart today. I can feel your hugs!

  • Reply
    Lyli @3-D Lessons for Life
    January 25, 2014 at 4:20 pm

    Barbie, I am so proud of you for taking this time to rest and renew. May God restore your joy and revive your passion as you meet with Him in the quiet space that you are carving out. Hugs

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:11 pm

      Thank you Lyli. Joy is something I am seeking.

  • Reply
    Laura Connell
    January 25, 2014 at 5:28 pm

    Hi Barbie, I sure do appreciate your honesty. Seeking Jesus is always the most important thing. So you go do that! And everything else will fall into place. Sounds like He is calling you to Him!
    Laura Connell recently posted..Fight the Good Fight in Faith

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 25, 2014 at 8:12 pm

      Thank you Laura!

  • Reply
    Debby Ray
    January 26, 2014 at 3:23 am

    Barbie, I will pray that you find peace and inspiration in your writing soon. Sometimes, God just wants us to listen for for a while. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to share with your Weekend Brew!

    Blessings,
    Debby

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 26, 2014 at 3:11 pm

      Thank you Debby!

  • Reply
    Pamela
    January 26, 2014 at 7:16 am

    It’s a hard place to be. I’m praying you’ll feel God close and peace will fill your heart.
    Pamela recently posted..Shine On

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 26, 2014 at 3:11 pm

      Thank you Pamela. I appreciate you stopping by!

  • Reply
    Pam
    January 26, 2014 at 9:29 am

    Barbie, may you know His arms around you, holding you close, and may His heartbeat breathe new joy, fresh light into your spirit. I know some of what you intimate here… and today on my blog I shared some encouraging words he gave me in a prayer time. Maybe they will speak encouragement to you too! Bless you!
    Pam recently posted..Into My Arms

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 26, 2014 at 3:12 pm

      Thank you Pam!

  • Reply
    Lisha Epperson
    January 26, 2014 at 11:41 am

    I have so much admiration for you! Bless you as you bravely walk in obedience to His call for rest. I wrote today how we must be mindful to post what He pours. The words will come Barbie! In fact they’re already there. Rest well and enjoy your coffee break with Jesus.
    Lisha Epperson recently posted..Do You Worry About Reach?

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 26, 2014 at 3:12 pm

      Lisha, thank you for stopping by. You’ve encouraged my heart.

  • Reply
    Natasha
    January 26, 2014 at 1:41 pm

    My dearest Barbie,
    Take time and rest in Him… Draw nearer to Him and let Him lavish you with His extravagant love. Rest in Him and be renewed… My prayers will be with you my beautiful friend!!! You are loved dearly!!!! Sending you huge hug and much love
    Natasha recently posted..Draw me Lord

    • Reply
      Barbie
      January 26, 2014 at 3:14 pm

      Love you Natasha. Thank you so very much!

  • Reply
    Kaye Swain
    January 26, 2014 at 4:34 pm

    Have a blessed and beautiful rest and remember that you are following the example of Jesus who also made sure He took time to rest. 🙂 Enjoy!
    Kaye Swain recently posted..Appreciating the Sunshine in Pierce County Washington AND the SONshine in Psalm 108

  • Reply
    LeeAnn G Taylor
    January 26, 2014 at 6:46 pm

    Excited to hear that Holly will be guest posting for you this week. Love her. Can’t wait to read it!
    LeeAnn G Taylor recently posted..I’m Sticking Around

  • Reply
    Kym
    January 26, 2014 at 7:42 pm

    Praying for you as you go through this difficult time.
    Kym recently posted..Scripture and a Snapshot: January 26, 2014

  • Reply
    Amy E Patton
    January 26, 2014 at 9:03 pm

    Barbie, I read your post late Friday night on my phone. I had more to say than my thumbs could type and am only now getting around to leaving a comment. But I have been praying for you since. Many writers/bloggers who publish books are drained and dry after the fury is over. So, know that what you are experiencing is normal. That doesn’t make it easier, but it does let you know that rest will refresh and words will flow again. We, your friends and readers, are here. Take the time you need. Lean on your Father, family, and friends. If there is anything I can do to support you or to practically help you please email me. Amy
    Amy E Patton recently posted..Life is a Soundtrack: Music for the Day

  • Reply
    Ann @ Christ in the Clouds
    January 29, 2014 at 4:08 pm

    Hi, Barbie! I totally understand….God even gave us all an example in the Bible, that we need time, now and then, to just rest and refresh, when He created for 6 days and rested on the 7th. Praying you find rest and encouragement, as well as new words from the Lord to write on your blog! You are such a blessing….and even if you need a break from “The Weekend Brew”, no worries. Just keep us posted, so that when you return we all will be able to read what God has laid on your heart!!

  • Reply
    Dayle
    January 30, 2014 at 7:14 pm

    Dear Barbie, I’m just now catching up on some blogs and am just now reading this. I’m sorry you’re struggling right now and sometimes the best way to find your second wind is to take a step back, in order to catch your breath. I have no doubt you will find your voice again, even stronger than before.

    Prayers, sweet friend.
    Dayle recently posted..Get Your Joy Back : Living for all You’re Worth

  • Reply
    Nannette and the Sweetheart
    February 1, 2014 at 8:54 am

    Oh Barbie, so sorry I didn’t see this last week!! I was out of town and just didn’t get my linking done. I am praying for you dear friend…we all understand where you are at. And when Jesus says to come away and be still then that is exactly what you need to do. He will meet you and refresh you, for however long it takes…your blogging friends and your precious readers will still be here.

    If I could do anything for you friend, just ask. ♥
    Nannette and the Sweetheart recently posted..The Daniel Fast -Lives Were Changed, Prayers Were Answered!

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