Where I’ve Been, Where I’m At and Where I’m Going // A Blog Update

I’ve been meaning to sit down and write this update for a long time, like a year or so, but you know life happens and sometimes you get crushed under the weight of it all. When I finally crawled out from under the rock, I realized I simply don’t have the energy or motivation to continue running my life in “full steam ahead” fashion. I’ve walked through some intense changes over the last five years. I handled it like a champ, or so I thought. But after a while I realized I just couldn’t appear to be strong anymore, so I retreated and hung out in the background. I am still working through the pain. Admitting that I have mild depression and anxiety over it all has not been easy, but I’m learning to be okay with it.

I’ve thought about closing down this blog for a while because I just couldn’t seem to “get my life together”. I’ve stepped back, much farther than most blogging experts would ever dare to suggest, and I’ve paid the price. But in the stepping back I realized that this is something I still love to do, even after almost 8 years. Even through all the changes, lost subscribers and intense periods of writer’s block.

Where have I been?

I’ve been here, and I’ve not been here. If you are still around, you’ve probably noticed a significant drop in posting, as well as a shift in focus here. Even though I’ve lost a number of subscribers and my daily views are about half of what they once were, I’m not fretting about it. I’ve been at this way to long to put my faith in numbers.  The bottom line is things change. People change. Circumstances change. We need to be willing to go where the winds of change take us.

This blog is an instrument for God’s glory, and I must not try to fit myself into the standardized mold that I see so many doing around me. I am me, and these are my words, and I am okay with writing, or not, and I am okay with you being here, or not.

Where am I at?

Honestly, I’m not really sure. I do know that still have a desire to encourage woman in their walk with the Lord. But lately I’ve been the one needing encouragement. I wasn’t sure how to handle the last few changes in my life and I just basically stopped being brave for a season and allowed myself to feel. Once I did that, I never realized how much grieving I was still doing over so many losses.

I’ve had to take a step back and ask myself if I’m doing any good by remaining here in this space. I do believe that the Lord has allowed me to keep this blog up and running for His glory as well as my benefit, to help remember this season and how he’s faithfully bringing me through.

But my focus has changed, dramatically.

Where Am I going?

I’m sure you’ve noticed the review posts, mostly centered around homeschooling. I know my readership does not comprise of homeschoolers, and to the blogging experts this would be a huge no no.  But the reality is that homeschooling is a huge part of my life, and it’s one worthy of sharing. If I can encourage one full-time working mom with the resources that I am blessed to receive and share, as well as by sharing my own experiences, than I am doing a good thing.

Will this blog turn into a homeschooling blog? No, not completely.  But it is turning into more of a lifestyle blog.  As I learn to embrace every day that God gives to me, I want to be free to write when I feel led to write, about what I feel led to write about, never under pressure, never because I think I need to, or because I fear someone may unsubscribe. I cannot promise you consistency, but I can promise you authenticity.

I cannot promise you consistency, but I can promise you authenticity. Click To Tweet

I will share more in the coming weeks about things I’d like to share in this space. I have so much more to say but this post is already too long.

If you haven’t already visited me over at my other blog, Let Us Walk Worthy, I hope you will stop by. Carrie and I have created a beautiful place for community and our desire is that we will encourage you to grow in your walk and intimacy with the Lord. Also, if you are looking for the Weekend Whispers link up, I’ve moved the link up to the new blog, with a new name, Let Us Grow. You can find the latest link up here.

Thank you for your patience with me as my life has transitioned so much over the last few years. I treasure each and every one of you.


Seeking beauty in the ordinary and embracing life to the fullest. Thank you for stopping by and come again soon!

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23 Responses

  1. Wanda says:

    Barbie, I have always admired your authenticity. I understand the struggle that comes with blogging. Mine has sat quiet for weeks now but I think it is important that we each embrace the freedom to allow our blogs to transform as we do. Have a great week.

    • Barbie says:

      Thank you so much for stopping by Wanda. I often think of you as I scroll through the blogs in my reader. I hope you are doing well.

  2. Thank you for the update, Barbie! I have also wondered the why of blogging myself…I think I am selfishly doing it for ME; because I love to write and this is where I am doing it, as well as in my journal – though that hasn’t been done for several days. We all go through “stuff” from time to time; and though we may be the giver or the caregiver or whatever, there ARE times when we need the care. I haven’t been blogging that long – just since the Oct. 2014 “write31days” challenge; though I have been writing ever since I was a teenager. My blog is mostly “stories” of my life and the journey of Dementia’s Demands, as I called that first 31 day series. I have been very lax in reading others’ blog posts; and my readership, though never really BIG, has really declined…I have a number of posts with NO comments. That doesn’t really concern me because, as I said, I write for ME…and when I feel led to share a particular story or post.

    I love reading your words; and I pray that you do continue to share…I have stepped back “a little” from Facebook; need to do so more!! But that is where/how I keep up with everyone. Prayers for you as you struggle through these days/weeks/months! And that God will continue to give you the words to share!

    • Barbie says:

      Thank you Barbara. I enjoy reading your blog and hope to get around more often. I really appreciate your prayers and friendship through blogging.

  3. Mindy says:

    I often struggle with sticking to on my one genre of postings when I feel like I hAve many different aspects of life I would like to share. Happy you feel more freedom here!

    • Barbie says:

      I think your blog allows you to post about anything. Your tagline is similar to mine – embracing every day. Thanks for stopping by Mindy!

  4. Mindy says:

    …sticking to one genre…(My little tablet wasn’t letting me preview what I posted. Oops.

  5. Cherie says:

    Barbie, you’ve always brought encouragement to me, and I’ve always been grateful. I love your heart and attitude shared here. That’s why your readers love you. I pray it will be a short season of rest and recovery and that you will be on your feet again very soon. {Hugs}

  6. Thanks for this update! I admire you and Carrie for taking on ANOTHER blog. Honestly , I have all I can do to keep one afloat. Thanks for your candid sharing of your heart in both places!

  7. June says:

    Sweet Barbie, honest words, offered in humility and with the desire to glorify Him will always be a blessing to someone. No matter what you share in this space, homeschooling, etc, you are my friend and I will be here to support you. Blessings on your week ahead, friend.

    • Barbie says:

      June, you are a treasured friend. Thank you for leaving such a sweet note. It encouraged me greatly.

  8. Mitzi says:

    I’m right there with you. Seems I just don’t know if I want to keep the blog going or not…then I play with it and get a bit excited….but it seems no matter what, I always fall back to photography. Guess maybe that is my calling?

    • Barbie says:

      I absolutely love your photography. I love reading (or looking at) photo blogs. I say keep it up! You’re doing great!

  9. Shannan says:

    I love your raw honesty. You have always been an inspiration to me and you still are. I think you are a wonderful person and I’m always encouraged by every post you make. God bless you my dear friend.

  10. Chrissy says:

    Don’t mind the numbers, the subscribers or the ones that decided to leave – they are not important! Important is your well-being! Sometimes we have to take a step back and take care of ourselves and our loved ones. That’s just life!
    You have always been such an encouragement to me and such a great cheerleader! I am sure those who count are still around! I know I am!
    Hugs friend xxx

    • Barbie says:

      Chrissy, thank you so much. You are absolutely right. The numbers just like to play with our emotions, don’t they?

  11. charis says:

    interestingly, at a very similar timing, i stepped waaaaay back from my blog as well for different reasons. same in a way however; i needed to navigate my heart and deal with pain and there was so much other transition in life at the exact same time. i have always appreciated your writing and sharing of your heart, no matter what topic you write on. you also are such an encourager and it overflows out of you in your writing.

  12. Barbie, I have not been keeping up with other blogs like I once did (it’s the season I’m in) but yours is always one I enjoy visiting to see what you’re sharing. I’ve always appreciated your honesty and heart to encourage other women. I understand how the rhythms of life change, as they do for me too and have with my blogging as well. Keep being you! And as someone who is at the beginning of a homeschooling journey, I find comfort in connecting with others who are as well. Thanks for all you do and how you’ve encouraged me!

    • Barbie says:

      Hannah, thank you so much for your note of encouragement. I’ve been reading your blog but haven’t left a comment. I will be back soon, I promise!

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