19 In Glimpses

When You Fall Short And Need A Little Grace // Glimpses Link Up

It takes a lot for me to be able to admit the depth of my reality at times, however, I know this is a safe place and I do this not to get attention, but rather to hold myself accountable. You are my people and this community has extended so much grace and I know there is more and more grace.

We all fall short and need a little grace from time to time, don’t we?

We all fall short and need a little grace from time to time, don't we? #glimpsesofhisbeauty Click To Tweet

Over the last year, or more, I’ve struggled to get into God’s Word. I think it all started when I began focusing on the many disappointments that I faced — times of intense prayer for God to do something, that didn’t happen; praise for a new, well-paying job for my husband that only lasted a short time due to a still undiagnosed injury; prayers for healing that never happened. And years earlier, prayers for God to save our home which we ended up having to sell.

I don’t like admitting that I’ve put myself in a place of doubt and fear. I’m struggling to get back to a place full of hope and faith. In the beginning, I would read His Word and just weap, and then the lie of the enemy came in and told me that the promises contained in His Word weren’t for me, that I had somehow fallen short and wasn’t worthy of receiving them. It became harder and harder to read His Word and allow it to sink deep into the crevices of my dry and barren heart. Over time, I closed the Book for a bit, and as more and more time has passed, I’ve been ridden with guilt over not doing what I know I so desperately need to be doing.

I know I need to begin again, but I feel like a new Christian and I don’t know where to start. I’ve always struggled with reading just for readings sake, but I know that perhaps I just need to begin, and allow the Lord to take hold of my heart again.

Perhaps I just need to begin and allow the Lord to take hold of my heart again.… Click To Tweet

I don’t want to die on the vine, but that’s exactly how I’ve been feeling. Parched, worn out, hungry, lost in a sea of unbelief. God has come to give me abundant life and it’s about time that I start living in that abundance.

God has come to give me abundant life and it's time I start living in that abundance.… Click To Tweet

So where do I go from here?

I don’t have a plan, other than to read His Word, every day. I’ve lost my way and I need Him to breathe life back into me.

I am being vulnerable and transparent with you (as I’ve always been) so that you can hold me accountable. Ultimately, I know this is a journey that I alone must take, but if God brings me to your mind, will you pray for me? Will you FB message me or text me and ask me what I’ve been reading in the Word?

I hope to write a post each week about my journey in His Word (yet another way to keep myself accountable).

Have you ever felt yourself dying on the vine? What have you done in the past that has helped you?

Thank you for allowing me to process life as it unfolds — the messy, beautiful and everything in between.

Glimpses #601-610

601.  Low calorie tea when you are trying to kick the coffee habit.
602.  A fast track at the ER when suffering another flare up.
603.  Quickly run tests to determine the issue.
604.  Tiny steps towards health.
605.  A great first day of school for my freshman and senior.
606.  More cleansing tears shed.
607.  Relatives with air conditioning to escape from the heat.
608.  Sugar-Free Popsicles.
609.  His grace abounds, still more and more.
610.  When the night is holding on to me, God is holding on stronger.

The Glimpses link up will open at 12:01 AM (PST) each Monday, and will remain open through Noon on Saturday. I am looking forward to reading your posts and visiting your blogs this week!

It is time to share the glimpses of beauty found this week.
Words written, gratitude given, photos taken, things created — anything that reflects the beauty of God revealed in your ordinary life.
1. Grab the button to place in your post, or simply link back here.
2. Link up with the post permalink, and not just your blog url.
3. Visit and encourage others who link up. We need each other!
4. Share about the link up on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter.
5. Use the hashtag #glimpsesofhisbeauty so that we can find each other’s posts.



 

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19 Comments

  • Reply
    Lesley
    September 4, 2017 at 12:36 am

    Barbie, thanks for your honesty. I have felt like that too. It was about 3 years ago. I was going through a difficult situation with a friend, it seemed that prayers were going unanswered and I was really struggling to motivate myself to read the Bible.
    Eventually I was challenged by a talk I heard that I just had to make the choice to do it, regardless of how I felt, so I began doing that. It was a slow process. At first I was only managing about twice a week but I kept going and gradually increased it. It took a few months before I felt I was beginning to connect with God again and about six months before it became something I truly felt I benefited from and looked forward to each day but it was worth the perseverance in the end.
    Will be praying for you!

    • Reply
      Barbie
      September 4, 2017 at 8:51 pm

      Thank you Lesley. I appreciate you!

  • Reply
    Bev @ Walking Well With God
    September 4, 2017 at 4:56 am

    Barbie,
    I’ve had many seasons of feeling like I was dying on the vine. At each one, I asked God, “Why?” The answers weren’t always clear and in some instances they never came. What did come, however, is my realization that each trial drew me, ultimately, into a deeper dependence and reliance on God. I knew I had two choices….I could stay mad at Him or I could throw myself into His arms as His wounded child. I chose the latter and He has wrapped me in His grace. Some problems still remain unsolved, but I have learned to trust His sovereignty even if it makes no sense to me. I have loved the Bible studies at “Deeper Waters” – especially by Denise Hughes. They have helped get me into His Word with a plan and daily reading. I’ve done Ephesians, James, Ruth, Philippians, Daniel, and several others. I highly recommend them. I will check in on you and will be praying for you. Thank you for being honest and vulnerable….you are not alone!!
    Love and ((hugs)) sweet sister,
    Bev xo

    • Reply
      Barbie
      September 4, 2017 at 8:52 pm

      I’ve seen many posts about the Deep Waters studies. I am going to make myself a note to check them out in a few months. Right now, I want to read without the study part. Thank you for your prayers!

  • Reply
    Michele Morin
    September 4, 2017 at 5:20 am

    Every day is a new beginning, Barbie, with new mercies fresh from the heart of God each day.

    • Reply
      Barbie
      September 4, 2017 at 8:53 pm

      AMEN and for this I am truly thankful.

  • Reply
    jodie filogomo
    September 4, 2017 at 6:26 am

    It’s been the hardest thing to realize I’m not perfect….but giving myself grace has been the best thing for myself!!
    We all are wonderful, no matter what.
    XOXO
    Jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

    • Reply
      Barbie
      September 4, 2017 at 8:53 pm

      So true. Thanks Jodie!

  • Reply
    Barbara H.
    September 4, 2017 at 6:49 am

    I think we’ve all been there to some extent at one time or another, if we’re honest. I agree with what Lesley said, sometimes just doing it even though we’re not feeling it gets us back on track and eventually opens the faucet, so to speak, again. I’m a big fan of reading a particular book of the Bible through rather than hit or miss here or there – the latter makes me feel a little directionless. Maybe something like the Psalms is a good place to plunge in. Though all of the Bible is directed at the heart, the Psalms particularly speak to our hearts and let us know others of God’s children have felt the way we have through the years. And though I don’t usually recommend a devotional book in place of the Bible itself, a good Bible-based devotional book like Daily Light on the Daily Path or Our Daily Bread can give us a bit of spiritual nutrition from which we can build back into a devotional habit. Praying that God sends you refreshment and encouragement through His Word as you seek Him.

    • Reply
      Barbie
      September 4, 2017 at 8:54 pm

      I decided to start in Psalms today, even before I read your comment, so I know it’s what God wants me to do. I hope to post an image from what stands out to me and a blurb on FB throughout the week. Thank you for your encouragement!

  • Reply
    Gayl
    September 4, 2017 at 8:34 am

    Oh, Barbie, I know the struggle. There have been times where I have put off reading the Bible even knowing that it was really what I needed. I didn’t want to read just for the sake of reading, either. It really helps to start slowly when you need to get back into it. I’m also realizing that it’s good for me to read every day even if starting out it’s just to make sure I do it. The more I read the more I realize how much I need it. Sometimes I go through the Psalms or Proverbs and sometimes one of the gospels. I love the gospel of Luke. Reading scripture helps put life back into perspective and eventually I’m ready for the parts that may be harder to read.

    You are a blessing, Barbie! Sharing your struggles helps us all see that we are not so different and can identify with each other’s struggles. May God bless you richly and draw you close to Him. xo

    • Reply
      Barbie
      September 4, 2017 at 8:55 pm

      Thanks Gayl. I’ve started with Psalms today. I appreciate you!

  • Reply
    June
    September 4, 2017 at 12:20 pm

    I’m sorry to learn you’ve been in the hospital, sweet friend. I am praying for healing. Cooler weather should be on its way! It’s hard to feel good when you’re overheated. I’m asking God to awaken the love and passion you used to have for Him. He is waiting for you with open arms, my friend.

    • Reply
      Barbie
      September 4, 2017 at 8:55 pm

      Thanks so much June!

  • Reply
    Donna Reidland
    September 5, 2017 at 12:01 am

    Barbie, if we’re honest we’ve all been there, probably more than once. When I get stuck, reading slowing and really savoring what I’m reading helps. I also like to read Psalms 19 & 119 and think about the verses that talk about His Word, maybe even pray them back to Him. In the meantime, I’m praying for you and I know others are, too.

    • Reply
      Barbie
      September 5, 2017 at 6:56 am

      Thanks so much Donna!

  • Reply
    Susan Shipe
    September 6, 2017 at 4:45 am

    All I am going to comment is this, “I am a very intensely pruned branch!!!” xo

    • Reply
      Barbie
      September 6, 2017 at 6:35 am

      Then I’m in great company Susan!

  • Reply
    Jennifer
    September 10, 2017 at 11:52 am

    I agree with MIchelle – HIs mercies are new every morning!! He – and His mercies – will meet you and be exactly what your soul needs and I know He will bless your faithfulness when you read His word each day. What a vulnerable and honest post….one for all of us to heed. Thank you for being willing to share –

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