My 10 year old daughter had to have two teeth extracted a couple of days ago. She can be somewhat fearful of pain, so I told her that if at all possible I would ask them to use “laughing gas”. She had a prior dental experience when she was about 7 where gas was used and it was easy breazey. However, I did not promise her anything and with her being older now, I explained that she may just have to endure a little bit of pain and discomfort. After talking with the dentist, and after watching her brother get a cavity filled with just a little drama, we decided to just use Novocaine. When the dentist came in, my daughter lost it. I could barely endure watching. She was so scared and I was scared for her. Yet I knew that she had to endure this minimal amount of pain in order to prevent further tooth decay and protect her other teeth. To say I felt like a failure as a mother is an understatement. She cried through the numbing process but I assured her that afterwards, she wouldn’t feel anything. At least that was a promise I could keep. She did fine for the rest of the procedure and promised she didn’t hate me for letting her go through the pain.
Over the last couple of days, the Lord has been speaking to me about the roots in my own life. Most are planted in good soil, where they will continue to receive nourishment and grow. However, there are some roots in my life that, although may have started out in good soil, have become exposed and contaminated with the disease of this world and unhealthy mindsets. These roots have become infected and the Lord says that now is the time for the extraction to take place. I do not like pain and I would like nothing better than the Lord to numb me first, so that I do not feel the process. But I believe that the Lord would allow me to endure it as a reminder of the things I must do to ensure a healthy root system in my life.
“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5)
Jesus is the vine. His roots go down deep. If I remain in Him, grafted and clinging to Him, then I will be free of contamination and spiritual disease. I long to bear fruit. I long for my roots to go down deep into good soil. I want to be so founded and built on Christ that nothing can shake me. Yet, there are areas in my life where I have allowed myself to become weak due to my lack of spiritual nourishment. My heart yearns for God, yet certain areas of my life are suffering due to my lack of intimacy with Him. It’s not that I don’t spend time with the Lord. But some days it’s just hard. And I long to go deeper. I want to bear the fruits of righteousness in my life. And I must continue to allow God, the Living Water, to bring health and nourishment to those areas where I am weak. The pruning process is hard and painful at times, but necessary so that my diseased roots can be pulled up in order for new birth and growth to take place and be established in good, healthy soil.
I love how the Lord speaks to me through situations in my every day life. My daughter has already recovered from her ordeal at the dentist. Me, I am continuing to ask the Lord where I am weak. My heart yearns for God. I know that He loves me even in my weakness and in those times when I feel so far away from Him. And so I choose to be exposed. I choose to be vulnerable and to face my weakness, knowing that where I am weak, He is strong. I choose to come to Him, empty handed, faced with my lack and my sinful state. And I say “YES”. I give Him permission to come, to uproot those areas in my life that do not bear good fruit. He is such a gentle, loving Father. I know that He will walk with me through the pain. His heart is for me. He loves me too much to leave me rooted in unhealthy soil.