As a writer, you never want to feel as if you’ve hit a wall and your voice is nowhere to be found. It’s discouraging when you want to say something, but there are no words. I’m tired of striving. I have always been real and authentic in this space, so I will tell you that I am in a hard place. There are many facets of my life that I am struggling with. And I haven’t been taking the time I need to seek His heart in these matters. It’s been both emotionally and physically draining. It feels as if I’ve been thrown in a pit without a rope, left to find my own way out. But I know He’s with me. He’s never left me, and He will deliver me.
Writing is just hard sometimes. I was on an uphill climb back in November with the final editing of my book and then the publishing of it in December. But ever since then, I’ve been a little out of sorts in the writing. The words aren’t flowing as easily as before. I seem to be fighting for the time to right, longing for quiet, reaching for revelation. It’s just not there. I’ve been considering this link up and that link up, just to keep this blog alive.
But when did writing become about survival?
I don’t want this blog to survive. I want it to thrive. But I’m tired. And I’m a little depressed. (What mid-life, post-menopausal, full-time working, stay up too late mom, with four kids, full-time ministry and a blog wouldn’t be?) I’ve been ignoring the emptiness inside of me. And, I’ve crashed. I have not the strength to keep climbing. I long for flat ground, where I don’t have to work so hard.
I am going to be taking a little break from the blog. I am hoping it won’t be to long. But I am in desperate need of Jesus. I am in desperate need of a touch from Him. I need to sit before Him, to wait in His presence and hear His heart for my life both personally and as it relates to my writing ministry. I do not doubt that He’s placed me here. But I know that without Him, I can do nothing.
Will you keep me in your prayers as I take the hand of Jesus and allow Him to lead me on this journey?
I have a wonderful guest post from my Inspired Blogger, Holly Barrett on Monday, so make sure you come back to read.
I hope to be back next weekend for The Weekend Brew. If I am not, no worries, I will have someone host it for me.
Thank you for reading my words, which are ultimately His words. I so appreciate you!
*I know this is a little different post than I normally write for the Weekend Brew. It is not meant to be a downer. I want to give you permission to lay down whatever it is you are striving for, and take the time you need to rest and refuel. We can do nothing without Him.
Now it’s your turn to share encouragement here at The Weekend Brew.
1. Share a post, photo, scripture — anything that breathes life and encourages.
2. Grab the button to use in your post, or simply link here.
3. Visit the person who linked up before you (and a few others if you have time).