Thank you all for sticking with me through this study. I got behind in my reading and forgot to post (again) last week. I have some very concerning personal things happening in my life right now, but I’m just going to try to keep plugging alone. I will finish the study, I promise. I hope you are being blessed as you read.
I cannot tell you how many times over the course of the last couple of weeks I’ve wanted to hand over my ticket and get off the train. Sometimes I just don’t understand God — why He allows things to happen the way they do. I haven’t been the best at dealing with our current situation (more on that later). I haven’t been in a place where I’ve been able to trust God.
But then I have to ask myself why not? I’ve been in this place before. Sure, it looked different but technically the same. And God was there with me, and He always provided. Always. So what is there to fear?
As I’ve been overcome with worry and fear, I’ve lost sight of all that I truly have to be grateful for. Even in the day set aside to rejoice in the birth of our Savior, I struggled. I fought for joy and lost the fight. I chose to give in to fear instead of keeping gratitude in front of me.
Gratitude provides a window to a windowless room. –
Kristen Strong, A Girl Meets Change
I love what Kristen shares about gratitude, as she was forced to wait for word of her daughter’s surgery in a windowless waiting room.
Gratitude is the way of hope, especially during seasons of difficult change.
Life can become dark and cloudy during seasons of difficult change. When I allow my heart to be filled with hopelessness, anxiety and fear, the only thing that will cause the light to shine in my heart again is gratitude.
Gratitude again brings the sun and fresh air to those windowless times in our soul and reminds us of what we have. The focus on what is missing blurs, and the focus on what is present sharpens. – Kristen Strong, Girl Meets Change
Even though I know that God is close to us in our current season of change, it’s hard to understand why He’s brought us here in the first place. Things were going so well, and then my husband hurt his knee and has been unable to work for a few weeks. We have no answers. We have no income (well, we have some but it will hardly pay the rent). We have lots of fear and anxiety. We find ourselves wandering around in this dark season of change, wondering where God is in all of it, instead of thanking Him for what He’s doing in the midst of it.
No matter what happens, I know that God will not leave our side. I want to learn to be grateful, in all circumstances. I am praying and asking God to help me.